White Noise: Part 1

  22^nd Street Station , New York .  5:30 p.m., Wednesday 

    From the corner of his eye, Dante caught a glimpse of someone familiar but quite unexpected.  He turned and immediately offered a slight bow to the man who had been standing next to him.

    "S...Sir…." Dante sputtered, uncertain if he should apologize for failing to notice him earlier.  Remus nodded once to acknowledge him.

    "Why..." He looked down at the floor.   An un-named sense that he could only describe as an absolute dread seized the core of his being nearly made him physically ill when he met Remus' eyes for that short moment.  He was used to Remus' menacing stares, but this felt different.   Something was very wrong. Or at least, it was about to go very wrong.  Dante's stomach twisted into knots as he tried to remember what he could have forgotten to do or have done to merit that kind of uneasiness.  The cacophony of the evening rush hour reminded that he was in a public place and it gave him courage to look up at his director.

    "Sir...you're not driving home tonight?" Dante asked, hoping his voice did not betray him. 

    "No.  I need to speak to you."

   Dante was mystified by the request.

    "Did I do something wrong?"

    "It has nothing to do with work, if that's what you're concerned about."

    "Then...?"

    Remus looked up and past him suddenly.   Dante realized his train had arrived and came to a stop.  Remus snatched his forearm and held to it as the passengers spilled out of the train.  Remus kept him close, maintaining the grip to make certain Dante was not swept into the train or lose him to the exiting crowd pushing by.  When the passengers started to board, Remus pulled Dante along into the train with him.  Dante followed, but with great confusion.

    When they finally managed to press themselves in the rear of the train, Remus pushed Dante into the corner. Remus crushed his body against his, imprisoning Dante in the small corner.  Reflexively, Dante's hand came up and tried to push Remus back.   Anything to give him a little distance between them.  The sudden intimacy between them was suffocating him and Dante found himself a little more than frightened by being so close Remus.  Then Dante remembered that he had always been a little afraid of him, even when Remus cast nothing more than impassive looks at him as he issued instructions in the office.  There was always something more than the expected professional intimidation but it was nothing Dante wanted to think about.  Now, it would seem he had no choice. 

    Dante's body stiffened instinctively, even before his mind registered why.  Someone's hand had slipped beneath his long coat, following the curves of his waist toward the small of his back.  The hand was gentle, in spite of its lecherous intentions.  Dante placed his hand on top of the offending one and began to push it away.  He suddenly realized who was touching him.

    "S...Sir" Dante whispered hurriedly. He was glad for the long coats both he and Remus were wearing that concealed everything Remus was doing to him. Dante continued to pry at the hand that had come to a rest on his ass.   Remus' fingers traced the center seam of his pants, the meaning of it clear.   Dante's face burned in humiliation.  He grasped Remus' hand and shook his head. 

    "No..." Was all Dante could force himself to say.

    When Remus merely smiled as his response to his plea, Dante became furious.  Dante's hand tightened on Remus's, making certain his anger was noted. 

   "Don't." Remus said, asserting his command into that one word.  "I'm sure you don't want me to ask the men here to help handle you..."   

   Dante's throat went dry at the threat.  Remus would do what he had promised.  Dante's hand dropped after a few seconds of hesitation. 

   "But sir..." Dante whispered, making himself as small as he could in the corner.    

    Remus drew Dante closer, pressing his face against the soft cashmere.  Dante breathed in Remus's scents--a light mix of English cigarettes and expensive cologne.   

    "Why are you doing this?" Dante whispered, writhing against the metal wall behind him--his eyes darted past Remus wildly, looking for any trace of venue to offer him an escape. "In a place like this?!"

    Remus bent and kissed his mouth, stifling the next question.  Dante could taste the slight traces of cigarette and cognac on Remus's strong tongue.  Dante had let himself be claimed for a moment, just to feel what it felt like. It was enthralling, he admitted, to be owned by such raw power but at the same time, it scared him.  Dante scrambled out from his trance to regain his own senses. He turned away, breaking the kiss that was bruising his mouth.  Dante pretended not to notice the stares he received from some of the men near him.

    "Why the sudden modesty, Dante?" Remus said into his ear then kissed it.  "I thought you liked this kind of attention.  Maybe you would like it better when there's many men touching you..."

    "No!" Dante said quickly, and perhaps too loudly.  He lowered his voice.  "No..."

    "Then you'll behave." Remus said.  It was not a question or a request.  "Undo your belt."

    Dante remain unmoved for a few seconds, scarcely believing the order that was given to him.

    "You wouldn't want me to do it for you." Remus continued, "Undo your belt and unclasp your pants."

    Dante turned his face away from Remus and stared at the metal wall to the right of him.  His hands were shaking as they worked to follow Remus's orders.

    "Good boy." Remus whispered.  Remus wound his left arm around Dante, bringing him closer.  From Dante's backside, his right hand slipped inside the loosened pants.  Dante breathed out an unsteady breath as his strong hand stroked the soft skin of the buttocks.  No matter how tender his touches were, Remus could not calm Dante.

    "It will hurt if you don't relax, Dante." 

    The warning came with the painful intrusion.   

   Dante cried into Remus's coat as one of Remus's intruding fingers pressed into him.  The finger felt like a hot spoke, burning the insides of him.  Remus's finger worked slow circles inside, milking pain from the sensitive passage.  Dante clutched Remus's sleeves harder, wringing the expensive fabric in his hands as the finger thrust in quick, sharp motions.  Dante blinked back the tears that had risen to his eyes and concentrated just on remaining still and keeping quiet.

    "My little lamb..." Remus said, and leaned to kiss away the first tear that escaped from the shut eyelids.  "You look so precious..."

    "Sir...Director…" Dante looked up into Remus's face, hoping to see a trace of compassion in it. "Please...I can't..."

    Remus thrust a second finger into Dante.   Dante held back the scream barely in time, but he could not stop the tears from flowing from his eyes.

    "You can't what?" Remus whispered into his ear.  The thrusts became harder and deeper, ripping at his very being.  "I think you like this...you're becoming wet..."

    Remus spread his fingers inside the tight passage.  Dante buried his face against his chest again to stifle a scream.  When Remus inserted a third finger inside, Dante bit him.  The bite was not intentional, Remus knew.  Dante was about to fall unconscious.  Remus retrieved a handkerchief from his breast pocket and wiped his wet fingers as soon as he pulled them out of the velvet-like warmth.  Dante collapsed against him, taking in deep breaths to compensate the screams he had held back.  Remus carefully re-clasped and re-belted the loosened pants for him.  

    "You want to get off the train?" Remus whispered into Dante's ear, holding the still-trembling body against him.

    "Yes." Dante said in a small voice.

    Remus laced his arms around Dante's waist, letting him conceal his tear-stained face against the cashmere coat as he listened for the recorded voice that would advise them of the impending stop.

    Remus held to his forearm as he was led through the station.  Dante felt ridiculous, like an unruly child being pulled through the crowd by an angry parent.  Remus finally released his arm when they emerged from the station.

    "What do you want from me?" Dante's burst of audacity, fueled by the anger he had stifled on the train, came with the freedom he was finally given.  

    Remus looked at him, a sparkle of amusement appeared in his eyes.

    "You will know soon."

    Remus seized Dante's arm again and started to walk him toward the row of waiting taxis.  Within a few steps of reaching the cab, Dante refused to go any further.

    "I don't want to go with you," Dante said, twisting his arm, trying to writhe out of Remus' grip.

    "I don't think you have any choice in what you want to do, Dante," Remus said with a slight smile.  "Unless you would like me to deal with you here rather than somewhere private."

    "Then tell me what you want."

    "You will know soon." Remus said again, then pulled Dante toward the first waiting taxi.

    Dante was unceremoniously shoved into the cab and as soon as the door shut, he felt his world closed in on him that moment.  Remus leaned over to the driver and said an address.  The driver nodded and pulled the vehicle away from the curb and into the near stand-still rush hour traffic.

    Dante wanted to tell the driver to help him...but he didn't. And he didn't know why he didn't.  He looked down on his lap stared incoherently at  his  trembling hands.  He was afraid of this man that had somehow taken him hostage but he was even more afraid of the consequences of trying to escape the predicament.  He wanted to lean over to the driver and plead with him to take him back to the train station--anywhere but toward where they were going now. He had lost his voice and bearing.  Then all he could do was think about the repulsive feeling of being molested on the train--the violation still stinging slightly through his body.   Why was he so compliant to the man who was taking him to a place where he would certainly be further violated? Dante's throat went dry, his chest tightened and he almost vomited.

    "Are you all right, sir?"

    Dante looked up at the voice and was met the concerned eyes of the elderly taxi driver who had turned to look at him.  Dante wanted to tell him to let him out of the cab but he could not find his voice.

    "He's fine.  My German-raised cousin is just a little nervous being in America for the first time," Remus said casually, then pointed at the traffic light that had turned green again.

    "Of course," the driver said and offered Dante a small smile before he returned his attention back to the traffic.

    Remus and the elderly driver carried on a light and mundane conversation about the International stock market.  The traffic, coupled with badly scheduled road constructions, made the usual twenty-five minute commute to Remus' address over an hour.  At some point, hearing the steady chatter of conversation that did not mean anything to him, Dante fell asleep leaning against Remus.  He woke when Remus shifted to retrieve his wallet from his coat.  

    Dante studied Remus's elite estate through the window.  Even in the dark and half-concealed by trees, the lone gray manor looked magnificent through the sculptured iron gates.  

    "Your cousin seemed to be very refined and so delicate," the driver said as he accepted the folded bills from Remus.  "I am glad to see an European raising had not spoiled him."

    The driver opened the rear passenger door for them after he counted the bills.

    "No, he's quite spoiled," Remus said with his usual smile.  "That's why he's with me now."

    Dante's face burned in embarrassment and deliberately angled his face away to avoid meeting the men's eyes.

    "Good night, Mr. Kennedy." Remus said, dipping his head only slightly.  The driver returned the nod, said "good night" in German for Dante before he drove off. 

    "You behaved exceptionally well, Dante," Remus finally said as the cab rounded a corner and disappeared from their sight.  "I am very pleased..."

    Remus pulled out a silver credit card from his wallet and gestured for Dante to come to him.  Dante stood fast on the sidewalk, his entire body seemed to be quivering.

    "I won't ask again," Remus said firmly as he swiped the card through a small gray box fixed to the right of the gate.  Both iron gates slowly rolled open inwards with a steady hum.  

    "I can't...sir..." Dante whispered and kept his eyes to the ground.  "Please allow me to go home."

    "So you go home and then what? Do you intend to leave your job, and maybe leave this city because this night didn't make sense to you so far?" Remus smiled as he walked toward Dante.  "Perhaps you would be paranoid for the rest of your life, expecting me to come for you any time, at wherever you decide to try to hide."

    Remus stopped in front of Dante and lifted his chin up to look at him.  

    "Or you can face your fears and find out the meaning of this..."

    "I...I just want to be left alone..." Dante whispered.

    Remus brushed his thumb across Dante's lower lip and laughed.  

    "You have been...for too long," Remus replied and kissed Dante's mouth.  

    Dante frowned.  Remus closed his hand over Dante's arm and half-walked, half-dragged him through the gates.

    "I am warning you right now, from this point forward, every time you resist or refuse me in any way, you will be punished."  Remus's voice had changed into a hard, callous tone.    

    Dante glanced back to see the iron gates close and everything seemed to stop for him that very moment.  A culmination of absolute terror and desperation that gave him the strength he needed to pull away from Remus' strong grasp.  Dante backed away, his eyes were large and bright, filled with hate.

    "Please don't touch me..."

     "You are determined to try my patience tonight, aren't you?" 

    Remus loosened the silk tie around his neck as he advanced toward Dante.  

    "Poor little lamb, did you think your life would be this dull routine of paper shuffling in some office, then maybe find someone to give you an hour of pleasure in bed on the weekend?" Remus said as he pulled the tie loose then unfastened the first two buttons on his dress shirt. "We has been very generous and has given you over two years of freedom, Dante."

    "Are you mad?"

    "Hardly," Remus smiled, folding the tie in his hand in half.  "I think you comprehend everything, if you really wanted to."

     Dante shook his head--he could not begin to understand Remus' words.

    "Come," Remus held his hand out to Dante.  "I may just over look your first offense..."

    "No...this is...insane..." 

    The next few seconds were a flurry of movements that occurred even before Dante could react.  Remus had seized Dante by his throat then threw him down on the damp grass.  The fall was not hard but it stunned Dante for a few seconds.  When he finally regained his bearing, Remus was stripping off his pants.  Dante's resistance was matched by Remus's hand tightening around his throat--threatening to break his neck as he suffocated him.  Dante was allowed to breathe when his pants were finally torn from him, the night's frigid air that invaded his nakedness made him feel more vulnerable than ever.  Remus moved between his legs, one of his hands remained holding his throat as the other reached into the cloaked darkness beneath the cashmere coat.  

    "I'll go easy on you, since I know you're scared and confused now..." Remus said.  "How much you want me to hurt you, depends on how well you behave..."

    Dante winced as Remus's fingers pierced him..

    "You will not scream and you will not fight me, understand?"

    Dante could only manage a slight nod.  Remus released the strangle hold on Dante and pressed two fingers into Dante's mouth.

    "Lick."

    Remus was pleased with the strong, rhythmic movements of the tongue against his fingers.

    "Very nice.  Maybe I wouldn't have to teach you that much after all..."

    Remus withdrew the wet fingers and bent to sample Dante's tongue with his own as he pressed the wet fingers into the still-tense passage.  Tears were still flowing from the closed eyelids, even as Dante's met Remus' kiss with equal fierceness.  Remus' erection pressed uncomfortably against Dante's inner thigh, but his fingers continued to work patiently to dilate the entrance.     

    "Don't think about anything, just focus on me..." Remus said, his voice unexpectedly gentle.  "Open your body up to me..."

    Dante felt his lower body being lifted off the ground and onto the soft warmth of Remus' lap.  Fingers opened his small entrance for something that felt too painfully big that forced itself in.  The pain, like a heated knife, drove slowly into his body.  Remus clasped his hand over Dante's mouth in time to catch a scream.

    Remus bent down and replaced his hand with his mouth, comforting Dante with slow kisses as he pushed himself in further.  

    Dante gradually became aware of the vestige of his former self, the one so full of pride and anger, slip away with the tears falling from him.  Then he decided he didn't care.  He didn't want to care why Remus was doing this to him.  Dante longed for warmth and comfort and Remus seemed to be the only one that could give it to him.  Dante wanted Remus inside him...so deep inside him that nothing and no one else could hurt him.  He just didn't want to be afraid anymore.  

    "That's it..." Remus whispered as Dante brought his legs up higher, inviting deeper invasion.  The sharp final entry was met with a sudden thrust of Dante's pelvis as his body arched to swallow the cock deep inside.

    "Dante..." The whispered sweet word filled his ear as Remus pumped furiously--in need and in hunger.  Dante clutched the cashmere coat in his hands, threatening to tear it as Remus brought him closer and closer to his climax.

    Dante vaguely recalled screaming as he came, then a curious kind of delicious heat spread from between his legs to the tip of his tongue.  A comfortable numbness wrapped itself around him, and spirited him into the lovely darkness.

End Part 1